It’s my BIRTHDAY today – cue the confetti!! My heart is filled with so much gratitude and love today, and that’s because of my incredible husband, Nick, and my two beautiful kids, Benjamin and Olivia. My loving family is truly my greatest joy, and it’s the best gift I could ever receive in life. So now that 35 is here, I’m ready to celebrate and enjoy all that this year has to offer!!
As any mom knows, nobody is more excited for your birthday than your kids! Ben was so thrilled that my birthday was coming up, and since he is on Spring Break, he planned the day around us getting donuts and dining outside for lunch. It’s so sweet that he wants to make the day special for me, with a few sweet treats for himself thrown in there! Since becoming a mom, birthdays take on that added layer of excitement because of just how special kids can make you feel. Their love and emotions are so pure, and it’s a great reminder of what truly matters in life.
If I’m being honest, as this day was approaching, I didn’t quite know how I would feel once I actually turned the big 3-5. After all, officially being in your mid-30’s is a rather big deal! When I was in my 20’s, I would always look to the mid-30’s age and assumed THAT’S when I would have it all figured out! So I had a sense of anxiety leading up to this birthday. But now that it’s here, I’m feeling peaceful and thankful. Thankful for my life, love, my health and all of the messy parts in between. This year has strengthened so much for me, and affirmed my faith in both myself and my family unit.
In honor of my 35th, I thought it would be cathardic to share 35 lessons I would tell my younger self. Here’s what I would say:
- Be kind and gentle with yourself. Make a conscious choice to be your biggest cheerleader rather than your biggest enemy.
- Family is everything. You’re going to have the best husband by your side for life, and you will grow to build a beautiful family together and they will become your greatest joy.
- Motherhood will change you for the better. You will find your greatest sense of purpose and meaning in your children’s eyes.
- Motherhood will also be a struggle at times. There will be sleepless nights and lots of tears. But it will always be worth it.
- A positive outlook can move mountains. Always stay positive and focus on the bright side of situations.
- Find the joy in the hard moments. Those moments will test you, but never break you.
- Health and wellness is key, so take care of yourself and those you love.
- It’s ok to ask for help in moments where you feel like you can’t do it all. Because you CAN’T do it all.
- Always lead from the heart. It will never steer you wrong.
- Trust your instincts. Listen to that voice in your head that’s calling out to you telling you the right way.
- Stay rooted in gratitude. Gratitude is everything.
- Those awkward grade school/high school years will pass. Life will move on in better ways than you can even imagine.
- Eat the darn pie. Don’t let anyone or anything make you feel like you are not beautiful at the size you are. Your scale will go up and then back down, but it doesn’t change absolutely anything about who you are or your value in this world.
- Never worry about going against the crowd.
- Not everyone will like you, and that’s ok.
- Always stay true to who you are. Nobody likes a phony. Authenticity is one of life’s true gifts.
- Change in inevitable. Don’t run from it, but embrace it.
- Let go of things you cannot change.
- Embrace the hurt. It’s ok if you feel pain. Push into it and not away from it. Learn and grow from it.
- Don’t trust everyone. They don’t always have your interests at heart. But give people a chance. They might surprise you.
- Anxiety is real and will always be present in your life. Learn how to cope in positive ways through exercise and talking with your support system.
- Don’t compare yourself to others. Everyone has a different path in life, with different struggles and different blessings.
- Always treat others how you would want to be treated. This is so simple, yet it’s so important. Be respectful to anyone you meet. Respect is a key.
- Be present. Always, always, always be present.
- Collect memories, not things. No material item will ever bring you more joy than the memories you create with those you love.
- It’s ok to take a risk in life. It might feel scary to put yourself out there, but you just never know what might come from it and who you might meet.
- Learn how to say no. If it doesn’t fill up your heart, it’s not worth your time.
- Approach life with a sense of humor. Never take yourself too seriously and find the humor wherever you can.
- Life can change in an instant. Always be thankful for the life you have.
- Honesty is a virtue. Always be honest with yourself and with others about your feelings – good and bad! Never apologize for being honest even if people don’t always like the message.
- Make time for yourself. A little self-care will go a long way for your mental health.
- Revel in the quiet moments of life. A family walk or an uneventfully peaceful dinner is worth more than anything.
- Smile as much as you can. Smiles are infectious and can change your mood and the mood of those around you.
- Don’t expect to have it all figured out. Nobody ever really does!
- Don’t focus on the past, but take the lessons you’ve learned from the past and grow from them. Use the past as a way to motivate your future.
